There is a pattern that I have begun to notice in life: the enemy really does hate us, but especially when we are trying to live for God. In hindsight, I see now how much of a hold he had on me in my past. At the time, I didn’t understand that it was him encouraging the negativity, the anger, and the unforgiveness in my heart.

It has taken time in my ever growing faith, in Jesus my Lord and Saviour, to finally overcome those old thought patterns and habits. Admittedly, he occasionally still takes hold, but now I am much quicker at recognizing when he’s at work so that I can work against him with the Lord’s strength – and through His Word.

The enemy knows exactly how to aim and where to aim when he attacks, and he certainly doesn’t miss with that aim. It’s almost as if he knows us even better than we even know ourselves, and perhaps he really does, but I know the Lord knows us from the inside out, not the outside in, which trumps the enemy’s work. I am ever thankful for that trump card, especially when going through some of life’s unavoidable negative experiences.

So often, we find ourselves stuck in a place of discouragement, judgement, and fear of what people will say about us, (or even think about us), and we wind up allowing this negativity to drive us down further and further. For example, some of us have a deep-rooted, enemy-driven, fear of people’s opinions of our outward appearances, or perhaps, our self-esteem has been driven to near non-existence – from years being put down by various influences in our lives, be it from family or peers. In either case, it causes us to feel as if we have failed in some way. Through that failure, doubt becomes prevalent in our lives, in our hearts, and in our minds. I know that I have been through these feelings of failure and desperation; as well as having a deep yearning and longing for unconditional love and acceptance that I had never found through people.

Today, things are different for me when it comes to my own self-esteem and self-confidence, especially after having received so many years of positive encouragement through my husband; as well as steadily learning more about what it is to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I went from having a mesh of beliefs from different faith systems, to finally having answers to the questions I’d had for years. It has resulted in in me getting to know Him and grow in a personal relationship with Him.

As well, I have come to trust that His Word is really all Truth (literally) – especially given the evidence of prophecies that have come to pass. The most powerful and convicting evidence for me is Jesus Himself. He, has fulfilled, against impossible odds, over 300 prophecies! That alone just washed away all of my nagging doubts!

My relationship with Him has grown in leaps and bounds in the past few years, to a point where I thought nothing could possibly shake my faith any longer. I felt ready to take on the challenges and debates that unbelievers often like to have with believers. There are people in my life who, from what I can tell from my limited human perspective, are not saved. A handful of these people are so very closed minded that they don’t really listen or comprehend the transformation I have been through in my recent past. They basically listen in order to prove their own points as being “right”. I have found that, in dealing with these types of people, their judgements tend to loom very heavily over me. This affects me in a way that I don’t necessarily expect, but at the same time, according to the Bible, I know I need to rejoice over their criticism and “disapproval”.

“Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me.

Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.” Matthew 5:10-12, NAS

“For I came to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; and a man’s enemies will be the members of his household.” Matthew 10:35-36, NAS

After witnessing some of the negative and critical nature of certain people in my life, my husband reminded me that even Jesus himself was not accepted in his own hometown. I’m learning, the way to battle the enemy’s attacks is to use the Word as a sword to counter His attacks. It is a strong reminder of our faith in Christ. I find it comforting to know that Jesus can relate even to this aspect of my life, resulting in the realization that I am not alone in this situation. I am also certain there are others out there who have similar experiences with others in their own lives, be it close friends or relatives.

“And they took offense at Him. But Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and in his own household.” Matthew 13:57, NAS

I can honestly say now that I am able to carry forgiveness and mercy in my heart instead of the old familiar enemy-driven feelings of anger and resentment, particularly towards those who have hurt me throughout my life. This has been a huge step for me to have taken, and I know it has enabled God to begin to work more through the talents He’s given me, (for which I am thankful).

The enemy still uses my past experiences to get me down, though, and my feelings of unworthiness have never fully disappeared, but I am now able to turn to the Word and realize that each one of us is priceless in the Lord’s eyes, being especially confirmed in one of my all-time favourite verses:

“Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.” Luke 12:7, NAS

This is such an amazing verse to me, especially when you sit down and analyze this seemingly small sentence. Think about it: the hairs on our heads are in a constant state of flux, an ever-changing number (everyone loses hair on a daily basis, and new hair grows to replace the lost ones; there is absolutely no way any one of us can possibly know how many hairs we have on our heads). If we ourselves cannot know how many hairs we have on our own heads, how amazing must God truly be, to know us at such an impossible level! This one small verse, and one small sentence, speaks volumes about just how well God knows and loves us!

Some may argue that God can’t possibly know or even be interested in every single person individually because He is “too busy”. In fact, I remember using this same line in one of my early conversations with my husband, who at the time was merely a good friend, and I have never forgotten his response: “So, you’re putting limits on an all-powerful God who is capable of doing anything?”

He makes quite a valid point here! This same response can be applied to the ever-popular comment of how “the Bible is written by flawed men. They are basically implying that God isn’t capable of ensuring we know Him, by using men to write His Word. Those who use this argument don’t understand the concept of how sin affects God or His ability to bring his fully, righteous, Presence physically near us here on Earth. Nor do they understand that He doesn’t want robotic automatons as His followers. He wants us to make that type of choice for ourselves.

Most people in our society fail to understand that the Old and New Testaments do not contradict themselves, (which is another popular claim), but instead support each other. Jesus Himself referred to the Old Testament often, and quoted from 24 different Old Testament books, (of which there are 39 – making it a substantial amount). Thereby, validating its’ relevancy as God’s Word.

These are perfect examples of the arguments that are used by the enemy, to convince our society that God can’t possibly care for each and every one of us. The verse above shows that the opposite is, in fact, true. If God takes care of even the smallest of sparrows… how much more value does a human life, (formed in His likeness), have to Him?

Jesus, Himself, showed just how well He knows each of us when He called out, and described one He’d never spoken to, by name:

“Now behold, there was a man named Zacchaeus who was a chief tax collector, and he was rich. And he sought to see who Jesus was, but could not because of the crowd, for he was of short stature. So he ran ahead and climbed up into a sycamore tree to see Him, for He was going to pass that way. And when Jesus came to the place, He looked up and saw him, and said to him, “Zacchaeus, make haste and come down, for today I must stay at your house.” Luke 19:2-5, NKJV

Another great example is Nathanael, whom He doesn’t call by name, but describes him accurately, made evident by the reaction He received:

Jesus saw Nathanael coming to Him, and said of him, “Behold, an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no deceit!” Nathanael said to Him, “How do You know me?” Jesus answered and said to him, “Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you.” John 1:47-48, NAS

The Lord does indeed know each of us and our heart’s desires.

Our secrets lay bare before Him; He sees our beauty from the inside, not the outside. It is through this understanding that I have gained much more confidence in myself. It is the reason why I endeavour to please my loving Father. He is the One who will never fail me or hurt me. No striving or effort is required with Him, unlike my natural inclination to strive relentlessly in order to please the different people in my life. The difference is, the Lord doesn’t disappoint us, and even in His rebukes, He shows us love and mercy.

I try to always remember that the enemy loves working through those we love the most. This is especially true, when they do not know the Lord in having a personal relationship with Him – a concept that is difficult for non-believers to even fathom.

I am now resigned to the fact that I will likely not be able to convince certain people in my life of the Bible’s truths, let alone the fact that Jesus was truly Emmanuel, or God with Us. However, I commit to keep these loved ones, (family and friends) in constant prayer, and ask the Lord to open and soften their hearts to His Truth.

Whenever I feel my old doubts creeping up, especially after a challenging encounter with them, and when I feel my old insecurities returning, I turn right back to The Word. It reminds me that Jesus – the one who gave up His life so that yours and mine could be spared – very much knows each of us individually, and He loves us with an abundance of unconditional love that we, with our human minds and hearts, simply would not be able to bear ourselves for others.

“A final word: Be strong with the Lord’s mighty power. Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the Devil. For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms. Use every piece of God’s armor to resist the enemy in the time of evil, so that after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that you will be fully prepared. In every battle you will need faith as your shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed at you by Satan. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all Christians everywhere.” Ephesians 6:10-18, NLT